On Friendship Day

I remember growing up with my friends, playing truth and dare games.

At the onset we were averse to it as teenagers, but as the game ensued and more of us began choosing to tell the truth, and that was a beginning of our coming closer to each other.

I recall some fun questions like “What’s your most embarrassing incident?” to more subdued questions like, “Who would you be 10 years hence?” the all night game ran the whole collection of frippery and somberness.

I recollect a very thought-provoking question way back from my teen years: “How do you selectt your friends?”

The question made me think. Think hard. Until I finally reached an acceptable answer.

I have always had the widest social circle in my life; have known too many people all my life.

However, when I think of some friends, who’d I call at 3 am in the morning, are very few – who have stuck with me through thick and thin…

During my school days, everyone in my class was my friend, some were good friends, and then there were these fancy names for the special ones – Best Friends Forever ( BFFs)

However, at that innocent age,  sharing lunch boxes, silly jokes, sitting together in the class, sharing pencils was an evaluator of “true” friendship.

Some of my friends had a crush on the same Hollywood hero – Jason Priestly from Beverly Hills 90210 or Milind Soman from A Mouthful of Sky - how much more affection can you ask for after all?

College paved way for extended interpretation of the term.

Missing classes jointly, auto rides to the nearest shopping center from the hostel, 10/- ice crème treats at the canteen, hovering on staircase, surprise parties in our small rooms - the freedom from an organized school routine allowed for more collaborative communication with friends, which, subsequently led to more sharing.

But what we shared were frolicsome things: ideas of perfect tall, dark, good-looking boyfriends, finding our own Mr. Right, silly fights and conflicts which make us laugh now, who is going around right now, who broke up with whom, joy of buying the latest dresses, our crushes, waxing horrors and late night Maggie parties…

When I started writing, my words have expression to my deeper opinions and I began having actual thoughts about what was real.

In time I understood I had more acquaintances than actual friends. That’s when I remembered by father’s constant words he always said to me – “ friends are few, rest are all acquaintances”

Since then, for me friendship implies,  having someone to count on to; it means having a good give-and-take equipoise; it means constant banters  and rants come easy and silent moments are never awkward; it mean being able to discuss anything under the sun; it means growing together emotionally and in hearts; it means having fun fighting to pay the bills; it means forgiving and accommodating; it means a complete union of mind and heart.

For me Friendship isn’t a sporadic tendency. And it certainly isn’t the number on your friends on your Facebook list.

It’s a lasting binder that enhances two people’s lives.

So, how do you select your friends?

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