Light a lamp, dismiss the gloom

As the countdown to Diwali began, my social networking accounts beamed up like a miraculous city, which had been turned on by an invisible hand. My apartment building lit up luminously with neon lights and various beautifully done rangolis and of oil-lit earthen lamps enclosed patios and ramparts, staircase and yards of apartments.

This was the first time however, when my heart refused to welcome Diwali – A festival I have always keenly looked forward to for this year Diwali bought many memories. The most memorable memoirs of Diwali I have are the ones spent during my early days. That’s when my father got everything that could be called new – clothes, Laxmi Ganesh idols, mitahis, crackers et al. That was then. This year, however when I lived through the dawn of Diwali , I couldn’t avoid but recall persistently the dialogue I had with my father on the eve of Diwali few years back. While conversing about the various Indian festivals and their probable genesis, he also shared his views about the Diwali. He said, "Like a tiny lamp that brightens its tiny environs, a strip of tiny lamps brightens larger environs. Likewise an individual can brighten his environs; while an organized act - allegory to several lamps organized in rows - can brighten up the cosmos."

Last year’s Diwali was special for me – as it was my first after marriage and also because it was the first time that my father sent me mitahis. Given that I had never been away from my house before that on any of my Diwalis. My father sent me Diwali mithais and card with a pack of floating candles to light up my house, from across the seven seas. It was the first time ever. He also sent me a note which read “Hope this finds you both in pink of health. Sorry Manasi, couldn’t send you the guavas (he knows my love for UP ke amrood ) along due to packing problems. Anyways, next time. Happy Diwali. Enjoy it. Tons of Love – Papa”.

It’s been a year since he left us and it’s been hard for us (my mother, sister and me especially) as it all happened a few days after Diwali. All this while, I kept wondering what that implied. But now I feel it means something…. In its symbolism, Diwali advocates people to conquer their fears and personality imperfections that keep us from gratifying our actual potential. So to say, it enlightens us to chase off the shadows that clouds all of our spirits. So as my mom, sister and I recall all the Diwalis in the past and the ones ahead of us, and we endeavor to be what my father worked his whole life to offer us the prospect to be: sturdy women with vivid futures. The fact is that life has to move on and although now and then it can be insufferably agonizing and a sluggish progression, yet we must not give up hope and embrace joys where we get them. I have often heard the cliché about time being the biggest healer and I truly expect it to be true.

Happy Diwali to you Papa, still waiting for the sweets this year!

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